Was hit with a blindside a few days ago...

[Doc]

As many of you know, I was diagnosed with lymphoma about 4 and a half years ago. I was treated with chemo and a drug called rituxan - I've been 'clean' since April of 2006 and things are going very well.

As a way of paying back for the treatments I've received, I've gotten very involved with the Leukemia and Lymphoma Society - I was already involved when I was diagnosed but given my own situation my level of determination for this organization has obviously intensified. Two years ago I joined the Team In Training Bike team and have participated in two century ride fundraiser and will take part in a third in June. I credit a lot of my success in these rides to our coaches, they are both very commited and they prepare us well for the rides.

Last week I learned that one of our coaches has made a truly life-changing decision - at the age of almost 51 he is starting the process to transition himself to being a woman. He's changed his name, he's wearing a wig, womens clothes - it is very strange. He has a Facebook page and he's been posting pictures of himself under his new name. Obviously you don't just wake up one day and decide to change your gender, I can only imagine the inner struggles this person has had with him/herself. This guy is married, has children and does very well in his job. Our paths haven't crossed since I learned about this - I'm usually pretty good about being objective and supportive but this may be the most bizarre thing I've ever encountered involving someone I know. Anyway, it's going to take some getting used to with our 'new' coach and I'm not looking forward to my first conversation with this guy under his new persona.

[HellYeahHokie]

Boy, oh boy. When I read the headline, and then the first 2 paragraphs, I was sure this post was going to be a lot worse. Glad you are OK.

["14-O" U.]

Wow. That is a shocker...

But I think I can help you with a conversation starter for your next encouter with your coach.

How about "C'mon, I know those bike seats can be uncomfortable but don't you think you're going just a little too far?"?

Seriously, I'd probably go with a line like that. Better than beating around the bush (pun certainly not intended)...

[MasterBevo]

OMG... 14-0, that is TOO funny! I was like HYH, I was very worried as to where that post was going...

When I first started working... in 1982, at Dow.. we had a computer programmer that I worked with pretty closely... "his" name... get this.. was John Manley. He changed it to "Joan".

He'd been married for 25 years... had two grown, and seemingly well adjusted children. But, he wanted to be a woman. I had known something wasn't right with the guy, when in a meeting, I noticed that his hands were shaved and he sometimes wore fingernail polish... after awhile, I started noticing a bra strap under his shirt.... so, I guess it was 'natural' progression.

Luckily for me, they transferred him to another department about the time he had the surgery. It caused problems, as the women in the other group didn't want him in their bathrooms.... can't imagine what they were DOING in there?? :confused:

Good luck...

[ZOOMBAG]

As many of you know, I was diagnosed with lymphoma about 4 and a half years ago. I was treated with chemo and a drug called rituxan - I've been 'clean' since April of 2006 and things are going very well.

As a way of paying back for the treatments I've received, I've gotten very involved with the Leukemia and Lymphoma Society - I was already involved when I was diagnosed but given my own situation my level of determination for this organization has obviously intensified. Two years ago I joined the Team In Training Bike team and have participated in two century ride fundraiser and will take part in a third in June. I credit a lot of my success in these rides to our coaches, they are both very commited and they prepare us well for the rides.

Last week I learned that one of our coaches has made a truly life-changing decision - at the age of almost 51 he is starting the process to transition himself to being a woman. He's changed his name, he's wearing a wig, womens clothes - it is very strange. He has a Facebook page and he's been posting pictures of himself under his new name. Obviously you don't just wake up one day and decide to change your gender, I can only imagine the inner struggles this person has had with him/herself. This guy is married, has children and does very well in his job. Our paths haven't crossed since I learned about this - I'm usually pretty good about being objective and supportive but this may be the most bizarre thing I've ever encountered involving someone I know. Anyway, it's going to take some getting used to with our 'new' coach and I'm not looking forward to my first conversation with this guy under his new persona.

Ok, wow! Kind of the "What the hell???". I would have no idea what to say, but every time "it" came around, I would be completely creeped out...

[Don]

..... Anyway, it's going to take some getting used to.....

it is a shock the first time you encounter a transgendered person. I remember the first time I was in my office talking to a student, a rather attractive tall blond. When she left, my friend, Barb, who has an office across the hall, comes in, plops down in a chair and says, "Ding, ding, ding". I asked "what's with the 'ding, ding, ding' stuff?" Barb says, "that's my gay-dar going off!" (Yes, she a lesbian!) Barb says laughingly, "that's NOT what you think it is, Don!" and asked what "her" name was. Barb tells me she would "check" with some of "my people" and give me a report. A couple of days later Barb triumphantly returns, smiles, and announces, "I told you so!" Barb says, "her" former name is XXXXX, that "she" has finished the transgender process, and now works as an exotic dancer in some of the local clubs.

Another, somewhat funny incident involved a another friend, Cindy. Cindy worked at a local computer software firm and had a coworker who was married with four kids. One day he comes in and tells her privately, that he is getting a divorce because his wife has "decided" that she is a lesbian. I tell, Cindy, that I have a female student with that same last name who just asked me to become the faculty sponsor for the Gay/Lesbian/Bisexual club on campus. Well, time passes and I find out my now former student is now transgendered and goes by "Chuck". I bring it up to my friend, Cindy, and asked her what her co-worker thinks now? She asked me "what are you talking about?" I recounted the story she had told me only to see her eyes nearly pop out of her head and scream "OMG". It seems she hadn't made the connection the first time around between my student and her coworker's ex-wife!

I even got a call from another friend (who's a lesbian) who was returning to school to get ready for Med School after years of being a PA. She called me after day 1 in Organic Chem class at UF. She wanted the story on Prof X who she could tell was a transgendered "female".

I won't claim that meeting transgendered folks isn't a surprise but the "shock" has worn off.

[HellYeahHokie]

It's the off-season, and the forums are going to turn into Jerry Springer.

[Doc]

with this person in his female attire will be very awkward but I'm hoping we can get that over with and move on. He/she actually attended a Team in Training event over the weekend as his/her female counter ego in a wig, make-up and a dress - he/she put pictures on his Facebook page. Very, very strange. I don't know how he/she is going to ride a bike wearing a wig! Plus, the guy/gal is a very strong biker so now I'm going to be getting my ass kicked by a woman!